what you have already lost, consider as totally lost

Have been getting up at 4:30 am every morning before work as part of a concerted effort to become an 'early riser'. This decision was influenced by two articles I read online recently: Tapping the Power of Your Morning Routine  and How to Become an Early Riser.  There are basically several reasons I've decided to start getting up early.  One is my wife has gone back to work, and our morning routine has become very hectic - I have to shower by 6:30, then wake K. and N. up and give N. her bottle and change her while K. takes a shower and gets everything ready, then help them get everything to K's car then kiss them goodbye while K. takes N. to my mom's house on the way to work.  Quite a change from my previous morning routine of rolling out of bed with just enough time to take a shower, change and drive to work before everyone takes all the parking spots at work.  The other reason is the desire to change my life and career.  I've talked so much about my desire to finally grab my career by the horns, get a new job or a promotion, start my own business, increase my income.  I'm still sort of coming up with ideas about what my next career move, but I do know that before I make a move I need to be excellent at my current job, which I'm not.  I mean, I'm ok, but I'm not excellent - which is what you'd expect from somebody who for the past couple of years has worked 40 hours or less a week.  If you habitually put in the time and work 10, 20 hours more than you are expected to at work, you will eventually become successful, you will distinguish yourself among other 9 to 5 workers.  So far so good.  It was tough getting used to it at first, and I think I'm still getting used to it - I noticed I was a lot more tired at night, I had a few mornings where I felt really sleepy driving to work, and left my lights on one time.  One side effect I hadn't anticipated is that I find that I'm able to enjoy my free time more with my wife and baby due to less mental energy being expended worrying about how I should be working harder on the job, and the peace of mind that comes from knowing that I'm living my life with integrity.  

Sometimes something happens that reminds me of certain things, mistakes I've made over the years, personal slights.  Things happen that frustrate me about my coworkers or my family.  I notice myself acknowledging these negative thoughts for a minute, analyzing them in a detached fashion, then letting them fade away.  This is a very good indicator of spiritual growth.  I was watching 'Britney - For the record' a couple of weeks ago and Madonna said something pretty relevant about a person's ability to affect their reality - when you are young, it feels like things are happening to you, and you have no control over your environment.  Growing up is the process of realizing your ability to shape your life through your thoughts and actions.  And growing up is the process of prioritizing your life so that the important things are always your relationship with yourself, with God, your friends and family, your personal development - everything else in your life radiates from this core of positive energy.