technical death metal

there is a continuation to this story, which i guess is cool, but it is still not going very well. in fact, it's probably done and i'm in the friendzone now.

she calls me back this morning, we talk casually for a few minutes. i should have just kept talking casually but i just feel like i need to tell her 'i was disappointed. it took a lot for me to extend myself like that to another person and you didn't even so much as write me a quick email to say 'thanks i got the flowers'. she tells me 'i loved the flowers, but i'm not going to call just because you want me to'. this escalates, she tells me her friends told her not to call me but she did anyway because she thought i was interesting. she tells me that i'm crazy, that i piss her off, that i called her seven times in one day and that i have way too many expectations of something developing between us. she tells me that i'm probably not right for her and to stop calling her.

i figure, ok, i should just be upfront with her. i tell her i'm not good at dating, that i was in a relationship for six years and that was my first date in six years and i'm just getting used to dating again. i tell her i liked her and did the best that i could at the time, and that i wish i met her a few months later and that she wasn't the first date i had in that long of a time. then we talk some more, and by the end of the call she changes her mind from 'don't contact me' to 'we can be friends, you can call me, but don't be crazy about it'.

after banging my head on the wall for a few minutes, i drive to work and here i sit at my desk, contemplating all the bull**** mistakes i made. set me straight, i absolutely do not want to repeat this again. i want to date women and have fun - why is it that somehow i lose all my strength and wind up getting pushed around by controlling women?

i've been listening to dyd audio books, reading websites. i've met a few women online, none were very interesting. i have a lot of stuff going for me - but my game is basically nonexistent. this is what always happens - i find someone i like and basically throw myself at them. it worked with my last gf, but it generally winds up like this. if someone else comes along that i like just as much, i want to be ready. give me suggestions about stuff i should do or read.